image credit Tiffani of freeplaylife
I don’t like to fall, I’m not strong, I’m not athletic, I don’t like instructions and I don’t like being afraid. So I’m the perfect candidate for a trapeze lesson, right? Actually, yes.
This was a leap year to remember. In February, the amazing Patti Digh was in town for a workshop and wanted to celebrate leap day by taking a trapeze lesson. Egged on by mutual friends, I accepted the call and signed up for the class. Nerves filled my thoughts so I studied the website’s photos and videos; read and re-read the details. I was flat-out scared and information was my key to convincing myself it would be okay. It wasn’t enough, though. I thought of a million ways to back out but when the time came, I put on a brave face and met my friends at the gym. My kids came with me, my husband was meeting us there- this was a big deal. By the time I got inside I was excited and determined but very worried about actually hanging from that bar 25 feet off the ground.
Knowing I would need a reminder of my intention, I painted fly onto the back of my hand. Looking up at the masters swinging and catching one another, I needed that gentle push and focused only on that one word: Fly.
The platform was really high and accessible only by two ladders bungie-corded together. I was told that once I started up the ladder, the logistics of the safety wires made it impossible to climb back down- I would have to leap. No turning back. Could this be more terrifying? Yes, people were watching.
After we strapped into our harnesses we were told how to reach for the bar, what the calls meant and how to arch our backs. The instructor would hold onto the back of my belt while I put my toes on the edge of the platform and leaned waaay out to grab the bar with one hand. One hand?!? I could barely keep my balance on the ground- how would I do it up on that flimsy swaying board? No time for doubt! It was time to fly. So up and down I went, five times, progressing all the way. First was a simple swing hanging from my arms. Then I was hanging from my knees and backflipping to the net. (I did this twice.) Finally the last trick was letting go and being caught by another flyer. (I narrowly missed his hands on the first attempt and nailed it the second time.) As terrified as I might have been, it was exhilarated and amazed. It was an incredible process from fear to mastery in a little over an hour and I learned some big important lessons. The moment I raised my head back and locked eyes with my catcher, everything came crashing together. I completely understood the power of trust and release.
You can watch the video here.
Lessons from the flying trapeze:
1. I’m terrified of falling out of control. I knew I would be safely harnessed but I was afraid that I would free fall into the net. Once I discovered that instructors would be holding the lines to gently lower me to the net, I felt safe.
Lesson: you are never alone; support is everywhere, even if you can’t see it you are being held.
There are people ready to soften your fall.
2. I was afraid that I wasn’t strong enough to hold on. What if I couldn’t grip the bar long enough? What if I climbed all the way up that ladder and slipped as soon as I jumped from the platform?
Lesson: the strength isn’t in the holding on, it’s in the letting go. It’s in the trust that you’ll land safely. It’s believing in the people who are holding the lines, breaking the blow. It’s in the courage to leap. It’s in the discovery that flying through empty space feels more secure that the rickety platform that a moment ago seemed safe.
It’s in the releasing control and finding that you don’t need to be calling the shots for it to work out.
3. I was afraid that I couldn’t do it because I’m not athletic. My legs aren’t limber, my core is weak, I said when they asked me to do the tricks. I practiced it standing on the ground and wasn’t even close to getting my legs up and onto the bar.
Lesson: there are forces at play that assist my movement if I let them. All of this had way more to do with physics than any physical effort on my part. I simply had to get the timing right and the momentum took care of the rest.
Get in action at the right time.
4. I was afraid to follow the instructions. I didn’t feel ready to let go when the call came. I thought I could do it on the next swing. I thought I could talk myself into it. It doesn’t work that way, though because of the placement of my body and the forces acting on it.
Lesson: Timing is everything and if I want to be successful I have to understand I don’t always know enough. The key was being ready to act as soon as the word was given. Trusting in the people who could see where I was and knew more than I did. As soon as I stopped thinking, started trusting and simply acted, I did it flawlessly.
Follow the instructions, don’t doubt, don’t overthink. Just do.
5. It’s not about not being afraid. It’s about feeling that fear and channeling it into determination. The ladder was incredibly rickety, the platform was really high and it swayed. I had to reach way out to grab the bar with just one hand. It was terrifying. I couldn’t get around that but I could remind myself how badly I wanted to do it. I didn’t want to be defeated but empowered. I wanted to prove to myself that I could do scary things, that I was strong. I wanted to enjoy myself and do something I had never done. I wanted that more than I was afraid, even though I was shaking uncontrollably. Seriously, visibly shaking out of my control.
Lesson: Dig deeply because you are capable of more than you think you are. Trust freely because things aren’t as bad as you think they are.
Surrender completely because you are safer than you think you are.
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I’ve bundled what I’ve learned into a month-long program to help you have the time of your life. Be sure you’re on the list to get a special discount code when registration opens Tuesday!
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